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Showing posts from November, 2018

Husker Balloon Released from Memorial Stadium Discovered on Mars

Lincoln, NE - While it's not uncommon for one of the thousands of red balloons released at every Nebraska football home game to wind up far from home in places such as Michigan and even New York , Friday afternoon's discovery by NASA's Curiosity rover easily takes the cake. NASA has confirmed that on Friday afternoon its Curiosity rover had come across one of the balloons on the surface of Mars. The iconic block N can be clearly seen in the photo released by NASA. The photo released by NASA on Friday November 16, 2018. "We know balloons are capable of traveling incredibly long distances over short amounts of time, but this is something else," NASA spokesperson George Diller said. "We're not even mad. That's amazing." Environmental groups from around the nation were quick to point to this discovery as an example of environmental damage massive balloon releases can cause, even to a planet that has been largely untouched by humans. &quo

Football: The Ultimate Litmus Test for a Relationship

Let me put on my angry old man hat for a moment and rant about the youngins'. I know, I know. Two weeks ago  I wrote a satirical blog making fun of those who blame younger generations for everything, but the student attendance the last 2 home games has been abysmal. Just putrid. My memories of going to Nebraska games stretches to the early 2000s and I can never remember a game in which that many students were absent. Maybe a few times the upper 3-5 rows were empty but that was it. Now I recognize not everyone is as die-hard as me, nor should everyone be, but I've made some tough calls to make sure I haven't missed Husker games in my short time on Earth so the old "it was too cold and too early" excuse doesn't really fly for me. That being said, kudos to the students who actually did show up. It is very appreciated and any criticism levied at student fans does not apply to them. Anyway semi-related story time. In 2010 I was a sophomore in high school a

Report: Only Nebraska had Millennials on its Roster the Last 15 Years

Lincoln, NE - While it has long been speculated by many that the decline of Nebraska football was due to be a mixture of infighting among university higher ups, questionable coaching hires and a de-emphasis on things such as strength training and the walk-on program, a new report released Friday morning suggests the entire Millennial generation may be to blame. According to the bombshell report, only Nebraska and a few other programs such as Kansas, Illinois, Rutgers and Vanderbilt actually had any millennials on its roster over the last 15 years. The report appears to be validation for some among the state's Baby Boomer and Gen X population who have vehemently sworn that the decline of one the NCAA's all time winning-est football programs to be at the hands of the lazy, whiny and entitled millennial generation. "My son should have known better when accepting all those participation trophies I gave him," said Bobby Boomer (56) a resident of Ord. "If he&#